Rhonda Stoppe – Continued

If My Husband Would Change

Continued from previous post

What’s the most important point in the book, i.e. the one piece of advice that can save a failing marriage?

“The key to loving your husband does not lie in how well he measures up to your expectations but in how well you love God.”

In Mark chapter 12, Jesus said the ultimate priority of life is to love God with all of your being. When you do so, you will find yourself enabled to obey the second greatest commandment: “Love your neighbor as yourself” (Mark 12:31). In this case your husband.

I am confident that pursuing intimacy with God was the single most important influence in transforming my marriage, and that can be true for you too. When your love for God is right, He will help you love your husband for who he is and not who you wish he would be. When wives learn that the secret to their happiness is not found in how their husband measures up to their expectations, they have discovered the first step toward building a no regrets marriage.

Rhonda Stoppe Cropped
A few fun questions…

When the words aren’t flowing—or when you want to celebrate if they are—what is your favorite comfort food and why?

Peanut M&Ms and coffee. I have to eat protein every couple of hours or my brain won’t function, but honestly when I am writing, I hate to stop the flow of thought to make myself something to eat. So, the peanuts give me protein, and the M&M part is just for a little treat to keep me going.

My husband makes me a pot of coffee in the morning that lasts me all day. Then, I switch to a smoothie if I get really hungry.

Stories and/or parables are an integral part of both the Old and New Testaments. Is there a Bible story, parable, or passage that has been particularly important to you and/or describes your personal journey of faith?

The first story (or historical account as I like to call them) that comes to mind from the Bible is the story of the woman at the well (John 4). I love how Jesus purposefully went through Samaria because He had a divine appointment to meet this woman with a shameful past.

And I love how Jesus sends his disciples on an errand to get food, so he could orchestrate the meeting to be just between He and the woman. (Imagine how differently she might have responded to Jesus if there were twelve men with judgmental eyes looking on and listening to their conversation.)

I relate to this account in a couple of ways:

1. I know I would have been this woman, and more had Jesus not stepped into my life and rescued me from my own people pleasing tendencies. As well as rescuing me from my need to find affirmation from men.

2. I am an evangelist at heart (all of my books contain in the appendix How to Have a Relationship with Jesus). So when I observe how Jesus took steps out of His way to go and look for this woman I am inspired to do the same. When Jesus began to help her see her own sinful state, He does so with grace and mercy. And yet, Jesus doesn’t side step the issue of her sin. Which reminds me that when God is drawing someone to Christ, He is convicting them of their sin. When sharing the hope of salvation, kindly help people realize they are a sinner in need of grace. If we fail to call people to repentance when we are sharing the gospel, we may be inadvertently “selling” them a false gospel that just says, “add Jesus onto your life so you can be happy.”

Next, Jesus tells her that He is the promised Messiah. Her—Jesus tells her, an immoral woman—when He hadn’t even proclaimed it to anyone else! In that moment, the disciples “just happen” upon the conversation. They are shocked to see Jesus talking with a lowly Samaritan woman. And equally astounded that He revealed the nature of His deity to this lowly woman.

Finally, I love that when the woman realizes Jesus told her everything she had done, and still offers her forgiveness of sins, she whole-heartedly believes in Jesus. Without hesitation, she immediately runs back to her village to tell everyone to come and see the One “who told me everything about my life.”

Oh that we would be astounded and in awe of our salvation like this woman. Oh that I would remember the life I would have lived without Jesus. And I pray that I would run to others with the same zeal as this woman, to hold out the hope of Christ to them as well.

In the story that is your life, are you the strong, female lead; the girl next door; the mysterious woman behind dark glasses; the super heroine; or the little girl trying to walk in high heels?

Hahahaha… I am the little girl trying to walk in high heels. I am in awe of the opportunities God has given me to proclaim His message of hope and truth in this generation. Without Christ in me, my “hope of glory,” I am just an anxious little girl pretending to be a grown up.

But with the power of His Holy Spirit and the Word of Truth, God continues to call me to new things—things that would scare me to death if He were not walking me through the open doors.

I completely identify with David who was amazed at what God had done in and through his life:

I Chronicles 17:16: Then King David went in and sat before the Lord and said, Who am I, O Lord God, and what is my house, that you have brought me thus far?

I’m a dog lover. Please tell us about your pets, if any, or your favorite pet as a child.

Oh boy. Pets? You want to know about pets? I live on a ranch in the mountains above the San Francisco Bay area. We have tons of animals because my husband is an animal freak!

Over the years I have raised Golden Retriever puppies. This is my FAVORITE thing ever. Puppies are so awesome. And it is so fun to see them go home with their new families.

Our strangest pets are our peacocks; we have about a dozen of them. One in particular is named Elvis. He is so arrogant, and obsessed with me. Often in the mornings over coffee I catch him peaking inside the window to see if I am watching him as he is pea-cocking for the peahens. On Instagram, I post lots of interesting pictures of Elvis (as well as our parrot named Troy, the original angry-bird).

Thank you, Rhonda! It’s a pleasure to have you as a guest at Divine Detour.

~ ~ ~

For more information about Rhonda, visit her website or follow her on Facebook or Twitter.

To purchase If My Husband Would Change, I’d Be Happy & Other Myths Wives Believe, log on to:

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2017-10-03T18:58:59+00:00 August 9th, 2016|Literary|Comments Off on Rhonda Stoppe – Continued